Featured post

Make a Submission

This blog is driven by submissions from users of their pictures, experiences and stories. Submissions are a huge help to others who may be going through the same struggles. To make a submission, e-mail clare@labiaproject.com

All submissions are treated with the strictest discretion and confidence, and your name will never be published on the site.

Zoe Buckman Champ Art Installation Celebrates Empowerment

Zoe Buckman ChampFeminist voices are becoming more and more prevalent in society, and a public art installation in Hollywood by Zoe Buckman shows just how far we’ve come. Standing a whopping 43 feet tall and measuring 9 feet in diameter, the installation named “Champ” features a glowing white neon outline of a uterus with fiberglass boxing gloves in place of ovaries.

The installation is a loud, proud, public symbol of female empowerment, speaking to reproductive rights, advocacy around domestic violence, and womens’ health awareness. It is situated at the corner of Sunset Boulevard and Sweetzer Avenue in front of The Standard, Hollywood.

As an artist, Zoe uses neon, embroidery, sculpture, and photography, and explores themes of feminism and systems of oppression. Sheย studied at the International Center of Photography, and is based in New York. She is an accomplished artist whose work has been featured in many leading galleries in the US and abroad over the past few years.

She is a bold and unapologetic feminist, and I will certainly be following her future work and her career.

Feeling so incredibly bad about my horrendous vulva

horrendous vulvahi. this is no happy rant – but i really need to let these things out and i have no idea where to go. i have been struggling with myself and my labia for at least six years now. to put it nicely i am so extremely sick and tired of myself. i’m in my early twenties and all i really want to do, is to live my life and fool around and be young and dumb. i’ve only had sex twice, both times really really drunk. the guys didn’t say anything bad about me or my horrendous vulva, and for that i am extremely grateful. i know that people with vulvas like mine have boyfriends and sex lives and what not, but for me it is not working out at all. every time i’m naked (both when showering, changing clothes etc but especially when having sex) and can’t stop thinking about how deformed and unattractive i feel. not only do i have a very manly vulva, i also used to have a third nipple, which i got removed some years ago. all this mess in my “womanly” zones really make me feel like a freak and it is scattering my feeling of self worth and my ability to be (enjoy being) a sexual being. when i’m having sex my mind completely freezes and the only thoughts in my head is how incredibly disgusting and just plain wrong my pussy is, and how the only right thing to do is to either destroy myself or my pussy. i know this is irrational thoughts and trust me, i am doing everything i can to keep them down. self destructive thoughts of that type are quite the mood killer in the bedroom. i do get horny and i do want to have sex, but even if i was ever brave enough to put my biggest insecurity on full display, i would never be able to enjoy it. i don’t even enjoy masturbating because – surprise – it involves my vulva, and literally every time i think of it, my thoughts immediately go straight to the self destructive / borderline suicidal thoughts. i have heard some people talking about doing it with the lights off, but for my that doesn’t change anything. just entering my pussy is a two-person job and there is no way my weirdly large labia could be overseen or ignored. when i was younger i was more okay (not okay at all, but compared to the current state) about my pussy, but during the last couple years it has just gotten worse and worse. right now i don’t even want to flirt or kiss or whatever because why should i? at the end i will still have to reject intercourse and then it’s just been a waste of everyone’s time. i feel so lost. if nothing is drastically changing the few years i cannot keep going anymore. i have been alone my entire life, i can really feel that NEED to feel loved/accepted/desirable. i see a lot of post here where people feel so relieved that they are normal. i really wish that would work for me too, but it just doesn’t. i am well aware that i am not sick or wrong or malformed (even though i definitely feel like it). i just wish that big labia wasn’t an unattractive thing, or something people only really like if they have a fetish for it. i’ve attached a picture where you can actually see what is what, and not just a big bunch of dangly meat. i am really sorry if some people feel attacked by this. this is strictly and only about my relationship with myself and my body. i really just need to share my thoughts with somebody.

Thank you for being brave enough to share. I know that it is a very difficult topic for you, and I am proud of you for recognizing that there is a problem and opening up about it instead of bottling it up. You may not realize it yet, but you have just taken a huge and important step in your journey towards self-acceptance.

That journey is not an easy one and will not happen overnight. Deep-seated issues like this can take months or years to overcome, so please understand that you have a long road ahead of you. But please also understand that there is an end in sight. Many women who go through similar insecurities regarding their bodies and vulvas are able to overcome them.

In your case, it would be a good idea to speak to a therapist who you are comfortable with, as your issues are psychological rather than physical (it is clear that you already know this, as you mentioned that you know you are not “malformed”). For what it’s worth, based on your picture, I can assure you that what you have described as a horrendous vulva, is in fact perfectly normal and beautiful in its uniqueness.

It is also clear that you are feeling pressure to have sex, but at the same time, are experiencing shame and insecurity which is preventing you from going through with it or enjoying it. It may be a good idea to take a conscious decision not to share your body with anyone until you have worked through and overcome your issues – not a decision based on shame and internal conflict, but rather one based on the fact that you will focus on your self-healing first.

Lastly, I am here for you if you ever want to talk or share or off-load in a safe and non-judgmental space.

Clare xo

Felt insecure about my big labia

felt insecure about my big labiaHello from Germany, im 28 and when i was younger i always felt insecure about my big labia. but over the years i realized that all the boys i was together with actually liked it…i was lucky i guess… your homepage also shows me im quite normal, too. thank you!

Thank you for sharing. And yes – you are perfectly normal ๐Ÿ™‚

Clare xo

Thought there was something wrong with my labia

something wrong with my labiaI’m honestly so thankful for this project. When I was younger, I always thought there was something wrong with my labia because they were larger than most labia I had seen in porn and larger than most of my friends labia. I now know that having larger labia is just as normal as having small ones and I have finally after as long as I can remember accepted it.

Thank you for sharing your story and lovely picture ๐Ÿ™‚

Clare xo

Complexes about my vagina

complexes about my vagina dark vagina skin

labia complex

labia pulled to the sideI’m 36 years old, I’ve never had any complexes about my vagina. I always thought it was normal. Until two days ago, when my ex-boyfriend, 35, after a fight on January 4, insulted the appearance of my vagina.

Look what he wrote me: Horrible looking pussy that looks like it wants to run away from you. It’s so long that you could tie it in a bow.

How can some men try to bring the self-esteem of women down? I can’t understand that behavior.

Obviously, he is mean and has a very deep sexual culture in porn and I think he wanted to hurt me.

But I confess, I thought about labioplasty today, until I discovered your website. It’s great this diversity.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

I appreciate it and I can keep my money for travel.

Thank you for sharing your story. It’s clear that your ex is an immature idiot who did not deserve you, and I’m so glad to hear that the Labia Project has helped you to change your perspective on labiaplasty.

I hope you enjoy your travels!

Clare xo

Changes to my labia minora

changes to my labia minora bridge between labia and anus

When I was younger, both of my labia minora were as small as the one you see on the left here, and shapewise they were perfect mirror images of each other. Not having examined them in any way for many years until I took these pictures yesterday, I hadn’t realised until then that one of them has grown bigger with age. I was surprised at the changes to my labia minora, but I still think they look just fine; I’m happy with the way they look. And I assume their smallness is practical in some contexts, so I appreciate that aspect, too. As for my labia majora, I’m not too pleased about them slowly losing their original fullness, but ultimately it doesn’t bother me all that much.

I could end my contribution there. However, I feel like mentioning that I have insecurities (to put it mildly) about other things in that area. I feel very bad about my anus, since I’ve had surgery for pyles four times, which has left conspicuous scars and “twisted” skin, plus I’ve since gotten new pyles. All of that is, or would be, clearly visible in some sexual situations, so it bothers me a lot. Plus, as you can tell, there’s this somewhat strange skin-“bridge” between my anus and my genitals, which I don’t love. Furthermore, I dislike my pubic hairs – their colour (they used to be much darker, matching the hair on my head), their quality/structure and their distribution. The worst thing about them, however, is that they’ve started greying, and they’re doing so in a silly way, the greyness spreading from the back towards the front. Oh, and with my partner being about 18 years my junior (I’m turning 43, and he’s 25), the greying is even worse for me – although he doesn’t care at all, and often tells me so. (I sometimes pluck the grey hairs, and it hasn’t been too long since I last did it, so the pictures don’t show the full extent.)

Ideally, I’d remove the many unwanted hairs in that region on a regular basis, i.e. all hairs outside the semi-natural “elongated triangle” that I prefer. But it’s just such a hassle, it causes skin pain either during or after removal (depending on the method), and doing it even hurts my back… so most of the time, I have a more or less messy hair situation (see pictures) that contributes to me feeling unattractive.

So, I’m far from feeling good about my private parts. I wanted to share that. But, to return to the topic – after all, this is the labia project – my primary “message” is this: I’m fine with my labia minora, I always have been, and I’m thankful for that. I sincerely empathise with all the women who feel bad about theirs; it must be hard. And I’m truly happy for those who used to feel bad about their labia, but don’t anymore.ย  Changes for the better in body image seem like a miracle to me.

I want to finish by saying that I applaud you, Clare, for starting and running the project, and I’m happy to contribute – in fact I almost feel morally obligated to do so after reading/looking at all the submissions. I hope your page will help many women; I know I feel a liiiiittle bit better about myself in general after seeing all the “un-pornlike” female genitals and surrounding areas on this page and reading about a number of other women’s insecurities. Although my insecurity (read: self-hatred) is not about my labia, I feel a tiny bit less alone – at least for now.

I wish you all the best – you and all other women. And all men, too – bless the heterosexuals among them for tending to like our genitals more than we do. ๐Ÿ˜Š

P.S.:ย  I’m sorry, Clare, if I’ve written too much, and/or gone too far off topic. I’d like for all of the above to go on the page, but you can, of course, cut out as many parts as you like. ๐Ÿ˜Š

Thank you for sharing your experiences and insights, and for your words of support for the Labia Project. I have published your submission in full ๐Ÿ™‚

Clare xo

My labia isn’t weird

Thanks so much for this page. It’s made me realize my labia isn’t weird!

I’m so happy to hear that the Labia Project has helped you ๐Ÿ™‚ Positive feedback like yours keeps me motivated to keep the site growing from strength to strength!

Clare xo

How to put in a tampon for the first time

How to put in a tampon for the first timeCAUTION: IF SQUIMISH TO BLOOD DO NOT LOOK!! I have a question about how to put in a tampon for the first time if that’s okay? I’ve always tried putting in tampons but can’t..I’ve tried looking in a mirror while doing and relaxing but it hurts? Like pressure? I even took a video and I’m confused on exactly where to put it? I’ve looked into the anatomy but still seem confused on where it’s supposed to go? Like there’s a pice of skin near there? The hymen maybe? But do I put the tampon beside it in, or in the middle cause there like a tiny hole there? I’m just so very confused sorry for any inconvenience I know this weird since I’m not your patient or anything I’m just worried. I’ve never done this before, idk how, I’m 18. I apologize ahead of time for the pictures they’re not the prettiest:( and are kind of explicit but I’m just trying to understand.

The hymen partially blocks off the vaginal opening which can make it difficult for some women to put in a tampon for the first time.

This difficulty often goes away with practice (it is sometimes an issue with the angle of insertion of the tampon). For first time use, try thin tampons for light flow as these are easier to insert. You could also try using a drop of lubricant to make the insertion smoother, but make sure that you use a water-based lubricant intended for vaginal use – not petroleum jelly or scented lubitants.

I have included an instructional video below which may help you with the technique for inserting a tampon. If you still can’t get it right, you may want to use pads for now until your hymen is broken or removed. If your hymen is blocking the opening, your gynecologist should be able to address that through a small procedure under local anesthesia, or alternatively, you could wait until your hymen is broken through sexual intercourse or other physical activity.

Clare xo

My labia is filled with little bumps

labia is filled with little bumps labia texture changedHi! I’m 21 years old. In the past few years I’ve suffered from a couple of particularly bad yeast infections. After my first one I noticed the texture of my labia had changed. Before all this started my labia was a sort of smooth texture and now my labia is filled with little bumps. I’m not sexually active but I’ve had a std test and everything except yeast infection came back negative. I thought maybe that once my infection was gone the bumps would go too but they haven’t.

None of the doctors ever said anything about it to me, they said I looked normal but I had never seen these kind of bumps before, after looking online it looks similar to vestibular papillomatosis but it’s hard to find much resources on it or stories from women who have the same thing.

I’m scared that when I do decide to be sexually active that a guy will think I have a std or be freaked out by how I look!! Am I over reacting? I just have no idea if I look normal or not.

Based on your pictures, it looks like you may have either vestibular papillomatosis (commonly referred to as VP), or a case of fordyce spots on your labia minora. Both of these conditions are not a cause for concern and are not contagious.

VP is a condition in which small skin-colored growths appear on the tissue of the vulva, and the condition may be causing it to appear as if your labia is filled with little bumps or protrusions. Many doctors view VP as a normal variation of the vulva, which may be why your doctors said that you looked normal. It is usually not symptomatic at all, but in some cases, women experience itching, stinging, burning or and pain. VP can also cause discharge.

Fordyce spots are caused by oil getting trapped in the sebaceous glands, and most women have them. You can read more about them in my reply to this submission.

While I doubt that there is any cause for concern in your situation, you may wish to ask a gynecologist about the bumps during your next routine examination to get a diagnosis and to (hopefully) put your mind at ease.

Clare xo